Category Archives: Life

Overnight Retreat and Pub Crawl

Saturday afternoon we dropped the kid off at Nana’s house and Heather and I headed downtown for a little parents night out action. We checked in at a swanky hotel and then headed to the Brady District for dinner at Sisserou’s.

We had some great shrimp appetizers and a salad a couple of fru-fru cocktails. We had a nice relaxing time.

Afterwards we took a stroll around the Brady District and Guthrie Green and chatted with some friends.

And then we hopped in the car and drove over to the Blue Dome District to see if would could catch some live music. First though we stopped in at McNellies for a pint. I love that place.

We checked out a couple of other places that were supposed to have live music but the vibe wasn’t quite right or it was way too smoky, like at Arnie’s Bar. So we went to the Dust Bowl Lanes and had another pint. During our walking around me and coworker said hello.

So then it was like what the heck lets head back to the hotel. They have a fabulous rooftop bar so we just stayed up there and watched the people and enjoyed the breeze. We had a great time although we may have stayed up a little later than usual.

Sunday morning, we slept in and walked to a restaurant, ate a nice breakfast. The waitress recognized us from the Blue Dome Diner that we used to frequent about three years ago. That is Tulsa. You can’t get away from anything here. The biggest small town I’ve ever lived in.

And then it was time to retrieve the kid an get back to real life.

A Long Day

This morning I got up and caught a plane to Dallas. What a day to catch a plane to Dallas. In Dallas, the grass was green but the weather was gray and drizzly.

Dallas has the most spectacular intersections I have ever seen. In fact Dallas has more concrete than any city I have ever seen. Concrete is big business in Big D it looks like. I don’t know if you can tell but I’m not a Dallas fan. Except for the Dallas Cowboys, now I like them. I am not a fan of the Dallas Fort Worth Airport though. I have been flying to it or through it for almost forty years and I hate it. The food is awful also. Hey, I like the Dallas Cowboys though.

I’d never seen Dallas so drizzly. Enough on Dallas, okay? We went to see a custoemr and it was a short meeting . Too short. We flew back to Tulsa just in time to…. Go to work!!! Groan. That is okay because I was going to go run on Turkey Mountain afterward with a group of people.

So I went to Turkey Mountain and there were three other people to run the trails with me. Trouble was, there were all fast and I am slow. Actually if I speeded up I would be considered slow. I don’t apologize for it, it is what it is. Anyway when it came to time to go I said I would go run the paved trail instead of going with them. They were nice about it and if I wanted to go with them they would have stopped every now and then to let me catch up but neither they or I would have been too happy with that. So they headed off to the mountain and I headed down the hill to the paved trail.

I didn’t want to run by myself on the mountain at night. I run all they time during daylight by myself and never get turned around but I do get turned around at night on the mountain.

Running on the paved trail on the west bank was pretty eerie. Kind of Blair Witch Project Eerie. Starting with the message on the road above. Why should I keep going.

I ran about a mile and a half up the trail to the poop plant. A city wastewater plant. they have a flare where they burn off the poop gas.

And a big huge spherical tank. I don’t know what is in the tank. I don’t want to find out.

The trail has a railroad crossing. It was kind of spooky at night.

I was glad to get off the trail and back home because I had some research to do after such a long day.

A nice home grown Oklahoma Imperial Stout.

Man, what a long ass day is what I say.

How was your day?

Pondering on Upselling

Upselling (sometimes “up-selling“) is a sales technique whereby a seller induces the customer to purchase more expensive items, upgrades, or other add-ons in an attempt to make a more profitable sale. Upselling usually involves marketing more profitable services or products but can be simply exposing the customer to other options that were perhaps not considered. Upselling implies selling something that is more profitable or otherwise preferable for the seller instead of, or in addition to,^[1] the original sale.

A sales strategy where the seller will provide opportunities to purchase related products or services, often for the sole purpose of making a larger sale.

Read more: http://www.businessdictionary.com/definition/upselling.html#ixzz3DXMcfofi

“…to try to persuade a customer to buy a more expensive item or to buy a related additional product at a discount.” (from dictionary.com)

I got to thinking. In the three years I have owned my little Kia Soul, nobody has tried to “Upsell” me on anything. Some of my coworkers are actually embarrassed for me. Almost all of the kids at my son’s high school drive bigger and faster cars than me.

When I take it to the car wash though I get charged extra because it is a “plus sized SUV.” I love that car wash! What salesmanship!!!

I guess that I am a lot more glad than sad about that. I don’t miss it.

What about you? You want to supersize those fries?

Robotic Zombie Babies

I have a story to tell. It’s mainly a true story but once upon a time Logan and his band of merry co-conspirators were going to a Godzilla premier party last Friday night followed by a trip to the movies to see the film.. We were going to pick up Logan and his friend, well, we’ll just call the friend Doug. We were going to take them home so they could “hang out” as the kids say these days. Oh they were really looking forward to it.

Only thing is that when Doug come walking out of the school he has a baby carrier with him. Huh?? Oh, poor kid has been stuck with a robot baby for the weekend for his Social Skills class. Take a look at the baby.

Isn’t it cute? It comes with a diaper bag and instructions. It is a computerized baby that cries and needs fed and changed and in generally taken care of. Apparently there is a pretty good market for such babies for use by schools teaching about parenthood.

The baby was supposed to “go live” at 4 pm. That kind of put a damper on the hanging out. 4 PM came and went and not a peep out of the baby. It came time to drive to their friend’s house (we’ll call him Flynn) where the party was going to be. We all loaded in the car including “baby” and headed off to Flynn’s house.

5 PM came and still no peep, Logan and Doug started relaxing because they decided that Baby’s batteries were discharged. Well…

At 5:09 baby woke up. At first with that quiet muffled cry that baby’s get when they wake up. Doug and Logan looked at each other and had that look like they hoped that baby’s crying wasn’t going to get too bad. Baby proceeded to quickly go from a quiet cry, to a “Hey, is anybody out there? type exploratory cry.” To a “I’m really pissed off and I am going to kill somebody full throated howl.” Then either Heather or I said that they better take care of the baby.

Then it was hilarious, Doug was trying to hold the baby but didn’t quite know how to do it, and was yelling for Logan to find out what to do and Logan was scrambling through the diaper bag looking for the instruction book.

Baby was getting louder and louder, Logan was saying “Oh gosh, Oh gosh.” Doug was trying to hold the baby in different positions. And I was being really helpful saying stuff like “Don’t worry guys, Flynn will know what to do!” and then just grinning to myself. Doug and Logan reminded of me of new parents of a baby.

Eventually the instructions were found and the baby’s button pressed and it calmed down. We got to Flynn’s house and the baby was quiet but Logan and Doug were totally worn out. Flynn didn’t know what he was getting into but Flynn’s parents were looking at the now sleeping baby skeptically. I was just wondering if they were going to try and take the baby to the theater.

So we left wondering what was to happen, glad that it wasn’t our problem.

I’m sorry to report that the baby got left in the car during the movies. Is there a DHS for robotic babies? They did better than I would have though. I would have left the baby at the house. Apparently the babies are computerized so that the teacher can download a file and find out just how well or badly somebody treated their baby.

We were just glad that Logan had done the alternate assignment that was a report on the costs of having a baby. We all got our sleep.

Have you had to take care of a robot Baby?

A City in Four Photographs

Downtown Tulsa from the south. It is a different view than most. It actually has a little bit of a big city feel to it.

Thursday was a whirlwind day. Heather and I had some personal business to attend to first thing in the morning so we drove Logan up to his school in east Tulsa and then drove to south of south Tulsa to the ‘burb of Bixby. Bixby is growng really fast and they have done a piss poor job of planning (“‘excuse my French”) because they have only one major north south street and so things get pretty tied up. We got there a little late but then we had to wait. So guess we were early not late.

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This is a double exposure. I used an Ipod Touch App called “Diana.” It takes two random photographs and mashes them together. You just keep shaking the device until you get something you like. I would say that only about one out of twenty combinations is halfway interesting. Still kind of fun to play with.

Then we drove back home and I drove downtown to work. And then to north Tulsa to Tulsa Country Club for the Natural Gas and Energy Association of Oklahoma Meeting and some networking. There I met our just retired CEO in the parking lot. I think he was going golfing, it was strange seeing him all casually dressed. Nice guy, very intense but a very nice guy.

I don’t know what it is but I love the fire escapes in the old buildings downtown. I just wonder what they would be like to actually use. I don’t think women in heels would do very well on these.

Back to the office and then back to south Tulsa for a meeting to clear up some confusion with a customer. Confused customers are not happy customers in my opinion. My coworker that drove was just winging it on the location of the customer’s office so we went round and round for a bit. We drove by Logan’s friend Doc’s house at one point. We got there, and unconfused the customer I think.

Downtown Tulsa from the "Spider" on Turkey Mountain

Downtown Tulsa from the south end of Turkey Mountain Park. I love Turkey Mountain and how it is a wilderness in the middle of the city. We need wilderness in the middle of our cities.

And then back downtown and a bunch of people stopping by saying “Did you read my email?” No, I didn’t read your fricking email dude. I get about 150 emails a day at work a day. I don’t really read them.anymore. I’ve checked, there is actually no company policy that says you have to read your email. Our policies and procedures cover everything under the sun so if they wanted me to read email they would have a policy in place telling me to do so. Do you feel less of me for not reading my work email? Information Overload is what I call it. The youngin’s don’t bother with email either. They “Instant Message” all their stuff. But only with cool, hip, people. So I don’t get IM’d

Do you read all your email at work?

The Domestic non-Adventures of a Long Weekend

This past weekend was a long one. I get every other Friday off. First things first though, I got a dental checkup. I snapped this pic and posted on Instagram. Turns out one of my Instagram friends, whom I have never met, goes to the same dentist.

Instagram blows my mind. On Facebook I at least know most of my “friends” at least a little bit. I have 200 or so Instagram friends and know most of them only by their photographs. It blows my mind sometimes this networks we build. Does this modern way of networking blow your mind also.

Afterwards Heather and I met up and went to see “Her” a very clever but disturbing movie about a guy that falls in love with his computer’s operating system. Seriously. Good flick though. But it is not the movie the trailers lead you to believe it is.

Later on we picked the kid up at school and took him to his barber. It is a kids paradise. They can play video games while they wait and watch movies while getting their hair cut. Plus, there the walls and plastered with messages like the above. I can’t figure out though if the messages are reminders for the barber or for his customers, or the customer’s parents.

Saturday morning I took Logan up to All Star Therapy for his weekly ride. The weather was nice enough that we went outside. .

Sunday afternoon we went to see the touring broadway show Chicago at the Performing Arts Center. I don’t know what it was, but I was just “meh” about it. Maybe it was the lady sitting next to me. She chomped on her gum the whole first half of the performance. Plus I could smell the flavoring of the gum. Yuck.

But hey, we are watching the Grammy Awards as I write this. The creativity and dynamism of the performances blow me away. Pink especially, she sang her song “Try” while doing some sort of trapeze act with ropes. It was amazing and I don’t think she was lip synching.

So, how was your weekend?

A Day Off including Sams, a Bottlecap Bikini, and getting into a Major Squeeze

Friday was my day off so we Sweetie and I hung out together.

We went to Sams where I scored a new Canon camera.

It replaced my hard working but crappy Fuji which died earlier this week.

I have a little nicer Canon that I use a lot but I always carry a smaller camera in my pocket a. I also carry them in races and I’m running in a 10k trail run today and I need to have a camera to document the race and provide a reason for my very slow time.

Afterward we went to the new Blue Rose Cafe on the Arkansas River. It is the hot place to be in Tulsa right now. I think the photo above is of the “Blue Rose.” And this must be her bikini.

It looks very uncomfortable to me, to say the least. Just studying on it a little I don’t think that it is a very practical concept. It is unique though.

The food is very tasty. This is their Blue Rose Special burger. It has blue cheese and bacon on it.

Afterwards we went to Whole Foods. We are smart enough to eat before we go there. That had some championship bunches of flowers for sale there. Pics were free though.

Whole Foods in Tulsa is the place to go to see things that are rare in Tulsa but common elsewhere. Like knit caps. Know what I mean?

What I don’t get is that the hotter the weather, the more people wear their knit caps. There was only about a third of the workforce wearing their caps at the store Friday and it was cold. Just wait until early August when it is will be 110F. They will all be wearing knit caps and flannel shirts. Can somebody explain this to me? I’m just a poor dumb Okie.

Eventually we went to pick up SuperPizzaBoy at school. The Occupational Therapist told us about a new gizmo that she had. A squeeze machine. Naturally I had to try it. WARNING, the pics below are not pretty sights.

I tried it on the minimum setting.

And I tried it on the max setting.

It felt great!! It is called a Steamroller Deluxe

Do you think that I might get one for my birthday?

How was your last day off? Hey retired people, you have days off also, don’t be kidding me.

Wild Wild Weekend

Whew, what a weekend.

Started Saturday morning when I ran in a 10K race. The Tulsa Zoo Run.

Sorry, I didn’t take any photos during the race. I decided to run this one.

No, I didn’t win it. In fact this is the scene I came upon within seconds of going through the finish line.

You know what this is? I’ll tell you. The results of the race I was running in had already been determined, printed, and posted by the time I finished. That was a clue that I didn’t win it.

However, I did get a picture of tiger defecating.

Just to remind you that although I love mommybloggers I am not one.

I also got a pic of resting rhino.

Later, Sweetie and I got dressed up for an early season Halloween Party.

Meet “Dirty Dog” and his woman, “Chick.”

Greatest collection of female hotness ever gathered together in one spot in Oklahoma. Hey where is Dawn?

An image stuck with me though. I don’t know why. It was like I was haunted.

Sweetest woman I’ve ever known but something not quite right about that girl.

Not done yet, Sunday afternoon SuperPizzaBoy and I played a rousing match of disk golf with the Tulsa Gentleman, Bill at the River Parks.

SPB beat us by a stroke to take the match!

What did you do this weekend?

A Day Off #2 and an Adoption Story

I work a 9/80 schedule. In other words I work 80 hours in 9 days over two weeks. So I get every other Friday off. I love it!!!! Sweetie and I generally spend it together and we spend it doing fun stuff.

This Friday, after I took SuperPizzaBoy to school, we had breakfast and puttered around the grocery store for a little while. Then we loaded up the bicycles and headed off for the Arkansas River trails.

The River Parks in Tulsa are beautiful. They are one of the great features of the city.

It was a perfect day, warm, dry, sunny.

I just love cranes, don’t you??? A new restaurant is being built over the river. It is going to be way cool when completed.

Sights on the River.

Old Route 66 marks the north end of the River Trails.

I always like to go by the “Bear Fountain.”

Afterwards we refueled on Diet Doctor Pepper, dropped the bikes off, picked up our Pomeranian, Rascal, and went to pick SuperPizzaBoy up.

Hey Bud, if you had a better day than we did, you had a great day!

Nope, we are not at the end yet. Sorry, I know that I need to get my story told in 5 seconds, but you have stuck around this long, stick around a little longer. I promised an Adoption Story and that is coming up!

SPB is having his friend Nick over for a sleepover so we went to pick up Nick. I love picking up Nick, he and his family are very nice and they also have critters.

They also have dogs, cats, chickens, peacocks, and Guineafowl. I posted about the helmeted guineafowl last week.

Well, today I got to talking to Nick’s Dad. He said one of the peacocks had laid some eggs but they never hatched so he want to a farm supply store and got some guinea eggs and substituted them for the peacock eggs.

Well, the eggs hatched and the peacock acts like the mother of the guinea chicks and the chicks think the peacock is mom. It is hilarious. I got a little close to the chicks and Mom was hollering at me, she was not happy at all. Sorry about the blurry photo. It was the best I could do without totally stressing her out.

What do you like to do on your days off?

The Birds and the Bees

I was invited to SuperPizzaBoy’s school last week to sit with my son while they received “the talk” from somebody from the county health department.

Who would miss such a thing? Well about half my son’s fellow classmate’s father’s, is who. I don’t get it? I hope you don’t either! Sometimes you just have to show up, no matter how busy or important you are. The school let us know a long time in advance. I bet you either Bush or Obama would have saved the time, if they had sons. (OK, how come Obama, Bush, nor Clinton had sons? Plot, plot, plot, I am on to something here!?)

Anyway kind readers, those with delicate sensibilities leave right now, because I’m about to get real. I mean real real.

I mean it!!

I really do!!!

I kept notes. You know, I thought I might learn something and I did. It is the fault of pituitary gland. Yep, the pituitary gland. I am ashamed to say, that I didn’t know that!

Here is the pituitary gland,

Yep, that’s it. It weighs 1/2 of one gram. Or about 1/900th of a pound. Man, does it cause a lot of problems! Its hormones trigger all the various changes in the body that turn boys into men and girls into women. It is right behind the bridge of your nose on the underside of your brain.

I kept notes on the rest of the talk. This is what was discussed. It was only an hour and that included a 17 minute video. The speaker was entertaining, informative, and blunt.

The Dad’s that showed up, we all had big ole grins on our faces. The kids, will the boys were a little embarrassed by the whole thing. The girls, with their mom’s were in another room, hearing their side of the story.

The speaker jumped in and we covered everything from testicles to wet dreams from hyperactive oil and sweat glands to American Idol, Zits to boners, broader shoulders to vocal cords, scrotums to morning wood, ovaries and eggs to federal income taxes, seminial vesicles to thinking about what kind of man you want to be, and prostates to deodorant.

Wow, I was worn out. The kids where shell shocked.

I give the talk a four on a scale of one to four.

Of course, this kind of thing is going to have to be revisited quite a bit. By the Dad’s. Not all jobs can be outsourced!

“This puberty is going to be a little harder than what I thought” is what one kid said.

Yea, no kidding. You have no idea. Its kind of like when prospective Dad’s at work who about to have their first kid say, “its not that big a deal.” Yeah, right dude, Your life is not going to change much. A couple weeks, you will be back to the same routine. No big deal.” “Hah, you fool,” you want to yell.

I feel sorry for the Dads who were too busy or important to come, and for their sons.

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